You Are Always at Choice

This post continues the Egypt Codes — reflections and transmissions from a pilgrimage that profoundly shifted my understanding of consciousness, history, and my own soul. If you’re new here, start with Part One.

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Egypt Codes Part Eight

When I opened my eyes in the second chamber of the Osiris Shaft, eyes misty, heart wide open, still coming out of everything that had just moved through me with the sarcophagus and the experience of witnessing that woman on the ladder, I knew what was coming next. 

The final descent.

Remember, the Osiris Shaft represents Osiris - the lord of the underworld, death, rebirth, and the afterlife. This wasn’t just some random underground chamber with stagnant pools of water at the bottom. This was a place that has long been associated with crossing thresholds… with moving between worlds… with death, and what comes after.

It is believed that, at one point in time, the entire shaft was filled with water. These are known as sacred, holy waters that move between the pyramids and the shaft itself. To this day, they still don’t fully understand how the water travels between them. There’s no clear explanation for it. And yet, it exists. Moving, connecting, sustaining something ancient that we can’t fully explain.

By the time we got to the final ladder, we were already deep into the earth (about 70 feet). Only a few people could go down at a time because the space was so small. You had to take your shoes off, climb down another narrow ladder into complete darkness, and step into water you couldn’t see. There was no real orientation point. You couldn’t look down and gauge where you were going. It was just you, your body, your breath, and whatever was waiting at the bottom.

Standing there waiting for my turn, I could feel how much was moving through people. Conversations were happening about how intense it felt, how heavy the energy was, how much death people could feel down there. And I could feel that, too. There were definitely layers of death present. Layers of human experience, of history, of everything that had happened in that space over thousands of years.

But what was just as clear to me was that there were other layers there, too. And it didn’t feel like one was more “true” than the other. It felt like they were all available… and where you met it determined what you experienced.

When it was my turn, I climbed down the ladder slowly. The rungs were wet and slathered with mud from the others climbing back up before me, and it was literally pitch black. The deeper I went, the darker it got, until there was no light at all. 

I was swallowed by the darkness. 

When my feet hit the water, I could feel the mud at the bottom, the coolness of it wrapping around my ankles, and that still, quiet density that only exists underground like that. We were now about 100 feet into the Earth.

And then, almost immediately, something else made itself known.

If you have seen the movie The Princess Bride, you’ll remember the part when she jumps off the boat to escape through the water and those terrifying eels start circling her. You don’t see them at first, but you can feel them getting closer, and then suddenly they’re there, wrapping around her, coming at her, screeching. 

That’s exactly what it felt like. These eel-like energies were moving around my legs and feet. Not physically, but energetically.

Guardians. 😳

I felt my body begin to clench with fear. I could feel that instinctual response begin to rise… that moment where your body wants to contract because your system is trying to decide if you’re safe or not. And then I heard it. Clear. Direct. Undeniable.

“You choose.”

It wasn’t subtle or a passing, random thought. It was a stern, direct voice, and I knew exactly who it was. 

Osiris. 

The God of that space speaking directly to me. And I understood immediately what was being asked of me.

I could feel how easy it would be to go into fear. How easy it would be to let my mind take the sensation of flesh-eating eels surrounding my heels in the water, in the darkness, 100 feet into the Earth, and build a whole reality around it. 😂 My brain wanted to let the experience become something overwhelming, something dark, something that would pull me into contraction and into everything I’ve ever known about fear.

Or I could choose something else.

I could stay with myself. Stay connected to my body, to my breath, to God. I could choose to align with what I knew to be true in my heart, regardless of the stories my mind wanted to make up. I could meet the moment through the truth of Source instead of fear-based conditioning.

So I made that choice, very clearly within myself.

I chose Unconditional love. I chose to welcome the Guardians of the space, swirling and hissing around my ankles in the water, regardless of how terrified I was. I chose to trust that my heart led me to that moment for a reason and that I could align with the frequency of God instead of choosing to fall powerless into the grips of fear.  

And the moment I did, the entire experience shifted.

The eel- like energy around my legs disappeared. Completely. What had felt intense and confronting just seconds before became calm and peaceful…rich with blessings and grace. Like I had reached a threshold and something had been waiting to see which way I would go before revealing its true nature.

It was a test…

That I apparently passed. Thank G-A-W-W-W-D. 😅😂

From there, everything softened. I suddenly remembered that there were a couple of other people there in the waters with me. We turned on a flashlight so we could actually see where we were, and the space itself was beautiful. The water had this sparkle and richness to it. The enclosure around us felt ancient and sacred in a way that’s hard to describe with words. And then I had this very natural impulse to start washing myself in the water.

It wasn’t something I thought about really, and it definitely wasn’t something anyone told me to do. It felt instinctive and intuitive. Familiar, even.

And I had this awareness come in as I was doing it… that this is what these waters were used for. These sacred waters were part of a cleansing, a purification, a preparation for whatever comes next.

And because I knew my soul had been there before, it felt like I already knew what to do. Like it was encoded somewhere in me. My body just moved and took action. I put the water on my arms, my face, my legs, letting it run over my skin, and I knew something was being cleared. Not symbolically or conceptually. In a real, physical, and energetic way.

I could feel all the places in my life where I had chosen fear, where I had left myself, where I had stayed in something longer than I needed to, where I let the conditioning of my mind lead instead of my heart… and it was like all of that was being washed away.

There was a lightness that came in after that. Simple. Clean. Grounded.

“KEMET!!!”

We heard our guides calling the word from way up above that meant it was time to go. 

As I began to climb back up the ladder, I was overcome with this insanely giddy JOY. I was tingling all over and SO HAPPY. I started singing a song that went “I’m coming up….I want the world to knoooowwww…that I’m coming up.” I was dancing and singing, slowly because those rungs were still wet and muddy, but it didn’t matter anymore. I was completely empowered.

We first arrived at the level of the sarcophagus to gather our shoes and belongings. The space felt different this time. The energy was more still, like what had happened before had integrated.

We continued up the ladder to the next level and found Veda Austin (one of our guides) waiting for us. As each of us came up, she hugged us and said, “Welcome back to life.”

What a beautiful welcome. That was exactly what it felt like. I was being welcomed back to LIFE.

Once we reached the doorway to climb out of the shaft completely, stepping back into the sunlight felt like something I had never experienced. I don’t even know if words exist that could fully do it justice. The sunlight felt more sparkly and alive than usual. The air felt different on my skin. Everything had this effervescent quality to it.

LIFE.

THIS is what it must feel like to be born. To come from the darkness of the womb, where everything is contained and held, into the brightness and vastness of life itself. That transition. That shock of light. That immediate aliveness. Just wow.

I was reborn into my life with a different relationship to it. What a gift.
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All of this is very aligned with what I’m seeing in people’s lives right now.

I’m watching so many people feel stuck in their circumstances, in their relationships, in their patterns… like they don’t actually have a way out or a say in what’s happening.

Which makes sense because a lot is shifting. Things that used to feel stable don’t feel as solid. Patterns that were easy to ignore are becoming harder to turn a blind eye to. And for a lot of people, it’s creating this underlying feeling of being stuck… or like life is happening to them instead of something they’re actively participating in.

And I get it. It can feel that way.

But what often gets missed is that we’re not as stuck as it feels… there is always a moment of choice in there.

Choice is one of the core principles I teach my clients and students. It is a key foundation. Not in a surface-level, “just choose differently” kind of way, but in the deeper understanding that our lives are constantly being shaped by what we are aligning with through our thoughts and actions, moment by moment… whether we’re conscious of it or not.

When fear is present (when something feels unfamiliar, intense, or uncertain), the body reacts quickly. The mind moves quickly. And if we’re not paying attention, we get pulled into that reaction before we even realize there was a moment where something else was available.

That’s how most people live.

Not because they’re doing something wrong, but because they’ve never been taught to recognize that moment… or how to slow down enough to see it.

Most of us were conditioned out of our ability to choose very early. Our instincts, our internal yes and no, our sense of what feels right or off for us get overridden over time. Sometimes for practical reasons, and sometimes simply because the adults around us didn’t know how to honor our autonomy.

So we adapt.

We learn how to stay connected, how to be accepted, how to move through the world in a way that works. And in doing that, we start making choices based on fear, on belonging, on what we think we need to do to be okay.

At first, those choices are conscious, and then they become patterns. And eventually, those patterns become so familiar that they run on autopilot.

So people stay in jobs that don’t feel aligned. They stay in relationships that don’t feel good. They override what they know, over and over again, not because they want to, but because it doesn’t even register that there’s another option available.

It just feels like, “this is what I have to do.”

And THAT is the part that I care so deeply about helping people to shift. Because there is always a moment, even if it’s subtle, where something in you knows.

It might look like reaching for something to avoid what you’re feeling. Or saying yes when you actually want to say no. Or staying quiet when you have something to say. Or continuing down a path you already feel complete with.

And in those moments, most people aren’t consciously choosing fear… they’re just following a pattern that’s been running for a long time. That’s why I always say awareness is the most valuable currency. Because with awareness comes choice.

The moment you can actually see what’s happening (the pattern, the conditioning, the place where you’ve been overriding yourself), you’re no longer blind to it. There’s space. And in that space, something else becomes available.

CHOICE.

That’s what I practiced in the water. I could feel the pull toward fear (clearly… I mean hellooooo terrifying eels 🤣), and I could also feel that there was another way to meet what was happening. So I chose that.

And that’s the work.

Not perfection or getting it “right” every time, but building the kind of relationship with yourself where you can actually recognize those moments as they’re happening, and begin to choose in alignment with your heart instead of your mind.

So if you’re in a place in your life right now where something feels off, or stuck, or like you’re not quite where you know you’re meant to be…

start there. Remember that you are ALWAYS at choice.

Don’t try to figure out the whole path forward, just get curious about what choice is available that might be more aligned with your heart. Those moments matter more than you may realize. And the more awareness you bring to them, the more access you have to something different.

After being reborn to my own life, we went on an hour-long private visit in between the paws of the Sphinx. The place believed to be one of the most spiritually activated places on the planet. 

Which… is a whole story in itself

I’ll tell you about that next.