The sacred… and the possibility of pooping my pants
Egypt Codes: Part Six
This post continues the Egypt Codes — reflections and transmissions from a pilgrimage that profoundly shifted my understanding of consciousness, history, and my own soul. If you’re new here, start with Part One.
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Egypt Codes: Part Six
Last time we were together, I shared about the unexpected guardian who quietly protected our space while we meditated against the pyramids. Our experience of him revealed an example of stewardship, presence, and the kind of masculinity that protects life without needing to control it.
What a gift it was to experience him and his energy.
The following day brought an experience that reshaped the way I understand life, death, and the thresholds we cross as human beings. And, strangely enough, it began the night before… with a dream. Actually, it wasn’t just a dream. It was a dream within a dream… within another dream. Three layers deep.
In the first dream, I woke up in the hotel room with intense cramps in my stomach. Everything looked exactly as it had when I fell asleep. The same room, the same beds, the same everything. My body hurt, and I remember feeling a deep sense that something wasn’t right. And then, I woke up.
Except I hadn’t actually woken up. I was still inside a dream.
Again, I was in the room. Again, the cramps were there. Again, something felt strange and unsettling. In that layer of the dream, aspects of it were super disorienting. My friend Leandra was behaving in ways that were completely unlike her - distant, cold, dismissive - and it was deeply confusing to experience. Then I woke up again. And this time… I really did wake up.
I remember looking over at Leandra and laughing as I asked her, half joking and half serious, “Are you real right now?”
Because when you wake up inside a dream that was real AF and then wake up again, it takes a moment for the nervous system to believe reality has actually stabilized. We laughed about it. But something interesting had followed me out of those layers of the dream world.
My stomach hurt. The cramps were real. Within a short amount of time, it became very clear that what I had been dreaming about all night was now happening in my waking body. Welcome to Egypt’s version of Montezuma’s revenge. They call it mummy tummy. And let’s just say… it lives up to the name. The cramps were intense, and my body was moving very quickly into a full-on digestive revolt… which was unfortunate timing to say the least.
That morning, we were scheduled to descend into the Osiris Shaft and then go on a private visit between the paws of the Sphinx… one of the most spiritually activated places on the planet. Neither of which are places where bathrooms are readily available, seeing as they are plopped in the middle of a barren desert.
The night before, our guides had mentioned mummy tummy in passing and told us there was a medicine that worked well if you caught it early. So that morning, I started asking around our group to see if anyone had it. No one did. Patricia (our main guide) had some, but she wasn’t at the hotel yet. Meanwhile, my body was making its intentions very clear. But my intention was clear too.
I. Was. Going. No. Matter. What.
When we got on the buses, our guides went out of their way and made a special stop at a pharmacy on the way to the pyramids so they could get the medicine for me. It may sound like a small logistical detail, but to me it was something much deeper. Throughout the trip, there were multiple moments where I felt profoundly cared for; small acts that carried a quiet strength and attentiveness. Looking back, this was another thread in that pattern. Another moment where the masculine presence around me stepped in and made sure I was taken care of. It was glorious.
Within about thirty minutes of taking it, I could feel my stomach begin to calm down enough that I felt confident I could continue with the day. Not perfect, but manageable. Looking back now, I see that the entire day was about thresholds, a crossing between worlds. And the first threshold I encountered that day was my own body.
When we think about spiritual experiences, we often imagine them happening in pristine conditions. Quiet temples, perfect meditation states, calm, centered bodies. But true spiritual initiation rarely arrives that way.
There was no pretending I had it all together that morning. My body was doing what it was doing, and I just had to deal with it. I had cramps, diarrhea, and was faced with the very real possibility that at any moment I might have to find a corner of the barren desert or a sacred site to hide in and pee out my butt.
It was far from glamorous.
But in hindsight, it was the perfect entry point into the teachings of that day because Osiris represents the underworld…Death…The great transition. And before we descended into the earth, my body itself had already become a kind of threshold. My body was emptied. My system was forced into a place of vulnerability and surrender. I had to ask for help. I had to rely on the care of others. I had to trust that my body would hold together long enough for the day to unfold. It made me tender, permeable, and feel oh-so-human.
Eventually, we arrived at the entrance area near the pyramids, where visitors purchase tickets and gather before moving deeper into the plateau. At first glance, it looks like a simple entry point - a place with informational displays and historical timelines for tourists. But to me, I felt something entirely different. Go figure.
The energy there was immense. Wave after wave of dense, powerful energy moved through the ground beneath us, almost like standing on the deck of a boat as it rises and falls on the ocean. It was one of the strongest energetic fields I felt anywhere during the trip. In the passageway just outside the building, there is a quote displayed on the wall that reads: “Man fears time, but time fears the pyramids.” Man, did that hit.
The pyramids have already outlasted civilizations, empires, religions, and countless human lifetimes. They are monuments to something far more ancient and enduring than our modern understanding of history. And, standing in that entry field, I sensed something else. It felt as though the pyramids themselves were not the only structures holding power. It felt as though there were energetic grids anchored deep in the earth - invisible structures that supported and sustained what we see above ground.
A reminder that what holds the visible world in place is often not visible at all.
Which, when you think about it, is true of so many things in life. Love, trust, consciousness, the unseen forces that shape the visible world. They all have an energetic blueprint. The physical cannot exist without the energetic.
By the time we began walking toward the Osiris Shaft, I knew we were approaching another threshold. This one literal. A doorway into the earth. But before we stepped into that descent, Egypt delivered such a humbling teaching. Sometimes the sacred arrives while you are navigating diarrhea. A reminder that if you want to access expanded levels of consciousness or spiritual truth, initiation is the threshold you have to cross to get there. And it meets you while you’re messy, uncomfortable, and unsure if your body will cooperate.
And the truth is… that doesn’t make the experience any less sacred. If anything, it makes it more so. Because the day that reshaped my understanding of life, death, and rebirth also included emergency pharmacy stops, the constant search for bathrooms, and one moment where I sneezed and quite literally thought I pooped my pants.
It was messy. It was human. And it was deeply initiatory.
The sacred isn’t separate from the mess.
This is the part we forget. We move through the messy seasons of our lives and label them as “not spiritual.” As human or something to “just get through”. Something to fix. Something to survive. We feel unsupported. Like we’ve been abandoned or like we’re alone inside of it. And in those moments, it’s easy to believe that something has gone wrong.
But that simply isn’t true.
Our soul is thriving in those moments. Our higher self and our soul are not experiencing struggle the way we are. They don’t look at hardship and see something that shouldn’t be happening. They see exactly what they came here for.
The soul knows that these are the moments where it expands the most. Where it evolves and earns what I can only describe as… soul points. Where something is gained that could never be accessed through comfort alone. So while we’re down here in the human experience, moving through heartbreak, loss, uncertainty, financial stress, health challenges, identity shifts… feeling like we’re barely holding it together…There is another part of us that is witnessing it all and saying, yes… this is it!!
This is the expansion, the initiation, the moment we came for.
And I know that might feel almost offensive when you’re in the middle of something really hard, because when you’re in it, it doesn’t feel like growth. It feels like pain and confusion, and like everything is falling apart.
But if you take a step back and look at your life…
Have you ever gone through something that, in the moment, felt like the worst thing that could possibly happen to you…
And then, once you made it through, you could see how that person, or that situation, or that experience was actually in service to your greatest evolution? How it shaped you and changed you and led you somewhere you never would have gone otherwise?
That’s the part we forget when we’re in it.
That nothing is wasted. That even the mess… especially the mess… is sacred. Remember that now, and always, my love.
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In many ways, the mummy tummy was the perfect preparation for what was waiting below the surface of the earth. Because the Osiris Shaft was next. And what happened there was a pivotal experience that I will carry with me for the rest of my life.
We’ll step into that descent together next time.
